Just Keep Swimmin'

Busy day doing nothing but avoidance. It's difficult to want to do things, even things I need to do, when I am mindless because of something stressful.

We are a one income family. Actually, it is a half-income one income...family. Or maybe his two jobs equal one...? Oh yes I am indeed losing it because that is making me laugh! B has a part-time job in one location and works part-time, semi-so?, with the Army National Guard. That would be two part-times so that is one! Oh for goodness sakes my mind is silly.

...and with this one income, this family of (now) five is busy dealing with debt like most in the United States. We are trying to stay afloat even while we are in bowels of the poverty level. Well, they say we are. Do they know something we do not? Whoever decided this is our location on the table of financial means has yet to impress me. I would rather believe we are much better off because of where we could end up being. I'm very greatful for where we are...very grateful. Because I know it can be worse.

I do not blame anyone but ourselves. We chose the paths. We've put ourselves on this spot. So it's up to us to get out. It will just take a little time. We can not help the medical bills from our daughter, my medical bills, the expenses of traveling to hospitals, of paying rent for an apartment when work ran out.....so many things over time! It just means...that much time to erase it!

Dory helps me with this. Yeah, Dory, from Finding Nemo! "Just keep swimmin'!" I know it will get better. Just keep swimmin'....if I keep doing that, it helps me to remember, it will go away. It won't always be this way. No matter how bad it gets. Today, tomorrow...are pretty bad for us. We have not been in this spot in some time. It will take a lot of my patience to work through the kids, who do not understand why we can not get bread right now, or milk right now...

My eldest gets it, but not the little one's. My middle baby, Little A, does understand the words "no money". She gets that very well. She also understands "it will have to wait" and "not this time". But sometimes, when a favorite cereal has to be passed over for milk, or when a favorite fruit is not bought because the price is no longer low enough.....it can get difficult explaining it. One day I hope they understand we did our best. For now, we just keep swimmin'!

Now to figure out a menu from my somewhat empty pantry....

Weeeee...